==> Link: Game time

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> ANSWER THE DOOR

Your brother had just knocked on your door as you were in a conversation with an old friend, holding a MYSTERIOUS PACKAGE. Upon opening it, you found the SBURB BETA and the SBURB SERVER PLAYER disks. With delight, you put the Sburb Beta in your computer and run the executable, watching it load.

Slowly.

==>GO GRAB A DRINK

While you wait, you notice your thirst, and notice your THIRST GAMBIT is low. With a shrug, you walk downstairs and grab your favorite drink, the awesome and amazing CAPRI SUN.

==> BE THE CAPRI SUN

...wait, what? That is the stupidest fucking thing you have ever heard in your life. How can you be a Capri Sun?

You put the straw in and sip on it as you walk back upstairs.

==>PESTER A CHUM

While you wait for the SBURB DOWNLOAD to finish, you decide to get ahold of a potential server player.

[style=width: 450px; padding: 10 25; background: #545454; border: 1px dashed black; font-size: 11px; font-family: courier new; font-weight: bold; color: 759B84; text-align: left;]
hyrulianChampion [HC] began pestering arcaneProphet [AP] at --:--
HC: I'm starting the Beta download, Kate.
HC: Do you have a Server Player disk with your game?

[KATE KELLEN]

==> STARE INTENTLY AT YOUR GAME

What the hell are you doing staring at it like an idiot? Boot it up!

==> INSERT GAME

There you go. Now you have to wait for it to actually download. What will you do to pass the time?

==> GET SOME FOOD

Food? Didn't you just have lunch, you fat ass? Whatever, you suppose a light snack wouldn't hurt.

==> PROCEED TO KITCHEN

You search the cupboards for the most unhealthy thing you can find. Something loaded with carbs and fat. You decide to make some extra-buttery popcorn.

==> PUT POPCORN IN MICROWAVE

You grab a nice greasy bag. You can just taste the butter already. Mmmmmm. You put it in the microwave and wait for it to finish popping. God, it smells so good. You hope that the sweet, buttery aroma doesn't attract any vultures.

==> FINISH POPCORN

Beeeeep! All done, time to grab a bowl and gorge yourself in your room and play this sweet game.

==> SHUT DOOR

You shut your door in order to keep your family out. Although truthfully, it probably won't. They usually just come in without knocking, anyway. What was the point in even shutting your door? It doesn't matter, your game has finished downloading, and you have popcorn. How sweet is that?

==> ANSWER CHUM

It looks like one of your chums has begun pestering you while you were getting your buttery fix. Don't just sit there, answer him.

[style=width: 450px; padding: 10 25; background: #545454; border: 1px dashed black; font-size: 11px; font-family: courier new; color: FBEC5D;]AP: y-yeah, I do...
AP: I'm s-starting the d-download as we speak...

[/font][/blockquote]

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> INSPECT YOUR ROOM

Looking around, you see your various TECHNOLOGICAL DEVICES, including your INVENTING DESK, your RETRO GAME WEAPON REPLICAS, and your CROCKERPOD NANO.

==> RETRIEVE ARMS

You have no clue why you would need to retrieve your arms. They're right here, attache-

Oh. A hypothetical lightbulb lights up in your head as you go over and pick up your MEGA BLASTER, putting it in your STRIFE SPECIBUS. This weapon is capable of firing CONCENTRATED BURSTS OF ENERGY and can be ELEMENTALIZED with the right upgrades.

==> PUT CROCKERPOD IN YOUR INVENTORY

As you put the CROCKERPOD in your TETRIS modus, the item is changed into a Tetris block, which falls down, much like the game.

Whew. It's a straight block. You rotate it on its side and place it at the very bottom of your Modus.

==> TAKE MORE ITEMS

You go around, picking up various items and putting them in your TETRIS MODUS. Soon, you have added 3 CAPRI SUNS, your INVENTING TOOLS, your MOBILE COMPUTER, and a SPARE SET OF CLOTHES.

Fortunately, you have finished 3 complete rows, so you have access to all these items.

==> ANSWER THE CHUM

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HC: Alright, I'm almost in the game.
HC: Jeez, this is going slow. D:
HC: Tell me when you get the Server copy downloaded so we can link up.
HC: ...heh. XD Link.

[KATE KELLEN]

==> FINISH DOWNLOAD

Oh hey, your game is finished downloading. Awesome!

==> LOAD UP ON USELESS ITEMS

You figure before you immerse yourself in the game, you should load up your inventory. For some reason, you have a FRYING PAN in your room. What are you doing with a FRYING PAN in your room? Whatever, maybe it'll come in handy somehow. You also load your inventory with some POPCORN, just in case you get hungry, your MOBILE LAPTOP, just in case you need to venture outside of your home, some CLOTHES, because you never know when you might have to change, and some COINS, because again, you never know.

==> ANSWER CHUM

While you were gathering useless shit to load into your inventory, you chum began pestering you once again.

[style=width: 450px; padding: 10 25; background: #545454; border: 1px dashed black; font-size: 11px; font-family: courier new; color: FBEC5D;]AP: a-alright, my c-copy is finished d-downloading...
AP: I'll b-be in game s-soon...
AP: l-link up... h-hehe...

[/font][/blockquote]

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> Game: FINISH DOWNLOAD

A small beep comes from the computer as SBURB finishes downloading.

==> Link: VICTORY DANCE

No. Just no.

==> OPEN INFORMATION ON GAME

You go to your BOOKMARKS tab on your web browser, Nix, and open the saved file on SBURB, reading over the rumors on what to do after you enter. You read what you need to, then open Pesterchum again.

==> PESTER CHUM

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hyrulianChampion [HC] began pestering arcaneProphet [AP] at --:--
HC: Okay, you should be able to help me enter.
HC: I'm sending you a file.
-- hyrulianChampion [HC] sent arcaneProphet [AP] "SBURB game rumors --
HC: Read the bit on a server player.

[KATE KELLEN]

==> STARE AT SCREEN

What are you doing? Stop staring at the screen like that, you're making it self-conscious.

==> ANSWER CHUM

AP: g-got it...

==> OPEN FILE

You open the file you received from your chum, and read the bit on server players, as he instructed. Alright, time to help him into game.

==> CONNECT TO SERVER

You load the file. There's not much more to it, soldier.

==> DEPLOY CRUXTRUDER

You move your cursor over the CRUXTRUDER icon and click it. Uh oh, it appears it may take up a lot more space than you thought it would. Looks like you'll have to improvise with this one. It's now that you actually deploy the thing. Your screen begins to blink several times upon doing so. Time to deploy that Alchemitizer.

==> DEPLOY ALCHEMITIZER

Just as you suspected, the CRUXTRUDER and ALCHEMITIZER are taking up a shitload of room. You're definitely going to have to improvise with such limited space like this.

==> PESTER YOUR CHUM

[style=width: 450px; padding: 10 25; background: #545454; border: 1px dashed black; font-size: 11px; font-family: courier new; color: FBEC5D;]AP: L-Link...?
AP: y-you might wanna c-check your roof...

[/font][/blockquote]

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> CHECK ROOF

You walk out of your apartment and climb the two flights of stairs to the roof, seeing that your server player has placed your cruxtruder and alchemitizer down on top of it. As you approach the cruxtruder, you start to think of something heavy enough to open it.

==> FIND SOMETHING FUCKING HEAVY

You go through the apartment building, and find a LIFTING WEIGHT in one of the gyms. As, you add it to your Modus, it appears at the top of the screen.

Luckily, the square piece fits right in a slot you made earlier, just in case, and you can access it. You run back up to the roof, and use it to pop the top on the cruxtruder. The weight falls off the cruxtruder and rolls off the side of the building.

==> Weight: REACH GROUND ZERO

The weight falls around 50 stories, before crashing into the ground, right next to a man with a fedora and a pipe, reading a newspaper. He makes no remark.

==>Link: OBSERVE CRUXTRUDER

As you watch, your KERNELSPRITE comes from the cruxtruder, and hovers towards you, idling right next to you. Some sort of countdown appears on the device.

Fuck. You never read what the countdown means. But you appear to have about 6 hours, so you should hurry.

==> RETURN TO COMPUTER AND PESTER SERVER PLAYER

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HC: I got my cruxtruder opened. Now what should I do?
HC: I need to get some grist. Is there a device that can do that for me?

[KATE KELLEN]

==> DEPLOY THAT GRIST THINGY

Your chum needs some grist. Give it to him! You should probably give him some ingredients, too. What should you give to him?

==> CHECK YOUR INVENTORY

Let's see... It doesn't look like you have anything that could be of use to your chum. Wait, didn't you load up some COINS earlier? Excellent! You knew they would come in handy. However, it looks like you loaded them up onto the 2 o'clock card... Damn it!

==> ANSWER CHUM

AP: L-Link...?
AP: y-you'll have to w-wait an hour f-for your grist...
AP: I-I'm so s-sorry...

==> DEPLOY CARD PUNCHER

While your chum waits, you may as well deploy the CARD PUNCHER for him. Good job, you should've loaded up your coins onto the current hour. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

[/blockquote]

[EZIO PACMEAN]

==> KNOCK ON THE DOOR

Some sort of MYSTERIOUS PACKAGE came in the mail today. You don't remember ever ordering anything recently. At least nothing that should come in the mail yet. Even though it's addressed to you, you figured that it's for your brother. So you head upstairs and knock on LINK's door to give him the package.

==> HAND LINK THE PACKAGE

You wait until he's answered the door and do just that. Hand him the package.

==> GO BACK TO YOUR VIDEO GAME

Yesssss! You're so excited to get back to your video game. You were playing online with some people that you don't know. But that's okay. CAUSE YOU'RE KICKING THEIR ASSES. You're really good at HALO. What can you say? You get downstairs and go into your room. No, your video game haven, and get back to playing HALO.

==> INVESTIGATE THAT LOUD THUMP

What loud thump? You take pause your game and turn the TV speakers down and start listening.

==> JUST GO INVESTIGATE ALREADY! IT SOUNDED LIKE IT WAS UPSTAIRS. ON THE ROOF MAYBE

The roof? Man, you really don't know where these commands are comin from, but this one was weird. Oh well. You gotta check it out to make sure that your little bro isn't getting hurt. Cause you care a lot about that kid. LINK is kinda your only family left, ya know?

==> CHECK OUT THAT LARGE THING ON THE ROOF

Wait, what large thing on the roo--OH THAT LARGE THING ON THE ROOF. What is it? You flick your wrists down and your HIDDEN BLADES pop into place. You made sure to put them on before leaving your room.

==> CONTINUE INVESTIGATING

You've already looked at it, and you have noooo idea what it is. You've considered taking it apart, cause most of the time you're able to figure out how things work if you just take it apart. But...it's probably your brothers. He does silly things like this every now and then. Maybe his MYSTERIOUS PACKAGE had something to do with this?

==> GO TALK TO THAT SILLY BROTHER

You hurry downstairs and start knocking on his door, ready to ask him some questions!

EZIO: Hey! Open up! I've got a couple questions for ya! Like...what in the world is on the roof?

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> ANSWER BROTHER

You turn around as you're converting items into grist, seeing your brother. Your card puncher and totem lathe are behind you, also in the process of being used.

HC: Uhh...
HC: Let's admit.
HC: You've caught me doing worse.

==> ANSWER CHUM

HC: Kate? I got it all figured out, but my brother is here.
HC: Brb.

==> STRIFE!

You don't wanna fight your brother, but you have limited time, and you really need to get shit done.

HC: I'll explain that shit later.
HC: But I don't have long. I gotta go do shit.
HC: Like get some gri- OHSHIT.

==> Grist: TAKE OUT GREEN-HAIRED HUMAN

Suddenly, a bunch of GRIST hits Link, bumping him into his shelf! It disturbs the stuff on it, causing a PIKACHU STUFFED ANIMAL to fall.

==> Pikachu Toy: DESCEND

The toy falls slowly through the air, then comes into contact with Link's KERNELSPRITE.

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HC: Goddamn it!

[KATE KELLEN]

==> ANSWER CHUM

AP: o-oh...
AP: o-okay...

==> NOW WHAT?

Well, there really isn't much you can do until your chum gets back. If he even does come back. You have a feeling he's got serious shit happening on his part. Maybe your sister is doing something cool, but you highly doubt it.

==> SEE WHAT YOUR SIS IS UP TO

Hahaha! You're not going to do that. There are other interesting things you could be doing.

==> BUST SOME MOVES

[/blockquote]

[EZIO PACMEAN]

==> REPRIMAND BROTHER

You look through the room past your brother and see some sort of thing and some other...uh thing.

Ezio: Lawls, it's true.
Ezio: Wait! Don't distract me. What in the world is up on the roof?

[/div]

==> STRIFE!

Man, you don't particularly want to fight your brother, but he seems to think that's the easiest way to deal with stuff. Your Hidden Blades stay hidden, but at the ready. Your brother likes to use blasters and that can be sorta troubling with your blade kind.

Ezio: No, explain now.
Ezio: Wait, what do you mean you don't have long? Is something wrong?

[/div]

==> GAWK AT BROTHER

You watch as your brother gets hit by some colorful discs? Oh shit, that actually looked like it hurt. You wonder if he's okay, then you notice the falling Pikachu.

==> GAWK AT KERNELSPRITE

Kernelsprite? What the fuck is a kernel sprite? Wait, what did that Pikachu just fall into? Is that a kernelsprite? Wait it just changed into a floating Pikachu? What in the world?

Ezio: Whoah bro. I don't know what's goin on, but if you only have a specific time to do stuff, then let's get it done.
Ezio: What do you need me to do? Just tell me what needs be done.

[/div]

==> HELP UP BROTHER

You walk over and offer your hand to help him up. You smile at him, hoping that this looks like movie perfect moment from somebody else's viewing point.

==> HELP OUT BROTHER

OKAY. Let's get shit done.

[LINK PACMEAN]

==> GET HELPED UP

You were helped up.

Yeah.

Aren't you fucking special?

==> LOOK AT STRATEGY GUIDE

LINK: Well... Here it says I have to get my capatchalog cards punched.
LINK: Could you keep putting useless shit in this grist thingy for me?
LINK: Not my inventions or anything, though.

==> STOCK UP ON ITEMS

You add your LAPTOP, a PIPBOY MODEL that your bro got you from a convention, a few MUSICAL CDS, your SPARE BLASTERS, and SOME CLOTHES into your TETRIS MODUS. After the blocks fall, you manage to add everything but the CLOTHES into a row.

The CLOTHES are now inaccessible.

==> PLAY WITH THE PUNCH DESIGNIX

After punching your CLOTHING cards, you have gotten the hang of it, and start to punch all your cards, entering the codes on the back of them as you do.

All your cards are now PUNCHED.

==> PESTER CHUM

HC: I've got the Punch Designix figured out.
HC: I'm gonna go make some shit.
HC: Could you help my bro make grist? Just throw useless shit in there.

==> CREATE TOTEMS

You get to work creating totems for your ALCHEMIZER on your TOTEM LATHE. After you make a few, you put them all in your TETRIS MODUS. Fortunately, making your previous cards punched has freed up all the space, and you make two rows easily.

==> ALCHEMIZE

Alright. Let's do this shit.

==> MIX COMFORTABLE CLOTHES AND PAJAMAS

You get the COMFORTABLE PAJAMAS.

Well, that was a waste of time.

==> MIX MUSICAL CDS AND COMFORTABLE CLOTHES

You get the COMFORTABLE CLOTHES WITH SKRILLEX T-SHIRT.

Now that's more like it.

==>MIX BLASTER WITH MUSICAL CDS

You don't know what this creates, because it costs way too much. Maybe later you'll have the grist to make this weapon.

==> MIX BLASTER WITH COMFORTABLE CLOTHES

You get the MEGAMAN ARMOR.

FUCK YES.

==> MIX PIPBOY MODEL WITH LAPTOP

You made the WRIST-TOP!

HELL. FUCKING. YES.

[KATE KELLEN]

==> ANSWER CHUM

AP: s-sure...
AP: I-I can do that...
AP: n-no problem...

==> HELP OUT

Yay, you're helping. You're such a fucking saint.

==> GIVE GRIST

You start to seek out random useless shit to throw into the grist thingy. You've already given up your COINS, so you're not really sure what else to toss in there. You find some stray POPCORN CRUMBS. Maybe those will be helpful. Probably not, but you throw them in, anyway. You then throw in more RANDOM USELESS SHIT. You need to pick up the pace, time is running out.

[/blockquote]

[EZIO PACMEAN]

==> ANSWER BROTHER

Ezio: Okay! Into the grist...thingy? Umm...okay!

[/div]

==> PICK UP USELESS SHIT

Okay! You start picking up trash that's laying around your bro's room. You then realize that you can use the grist thingy as a trash can of sorts! Woot woot! Not that you like cleaning...at all. But if this is helping your bro out and you're cleaning, you are able to think of it more as a game and less as cleaning and that makes everything better!

==> CONTINUE CLEANING

You do so and continue throwing trash and shit into the grist thingy. Crumpled up paper (that you first make sure isn't homework...although you let some history papers slide and throw them away too), empty plastic cups, paper plates, all of it goes into the grist thingy.